Am I Healed?

Am I Healed? I guess that’s the pertinent question today. And I had purposely used this title to entice those who follow my blog to continue reading.

Because of my condition, what I had delayed for a long time I’d stared to do and so I was at the lawyer’s office yesterday to sort out and complete some paperwork. How I got to know this lawyer was through the recommendation of my Great Eastern Financial Consultant. Yes… they are no longer called Insurance Agent!!

Anyway, the world is very small and more so for Singapore. However, in this case, I say it is God providence and planning for there is nothing coincidental in God’s will and planning. This particular lawyer happened to be a former business associate to Josie’s boss and in-house lawyer. When we first met, we were going through some background information and got to know that the lawyer’s wife had also gone though a battle with cancer and are well today. Through the various meetings, he always talked about God with me and encourages me about God’s healing touch and power and the various instances he knows of people who were healed. In one of the meeting, after we had signed the Will, he conducted simple communion for us.

By the way, if you had not done your Will, do so now!! Do not delay, talk care of your family matter first and foremost and have no unfinished baggage.

Yesterday I was at the lawyer’s office again signing another document and we started talking. In all our meeting, we seem to talk for half to one hour first about God and sharing before we get done to the legal paperwork. When we met, we started talking and I cannot remember the specific but I was chided by him. Essentially, when I mentioned that I do not know if I am healed, he said “No… You are healed”.

Anyway, I sort started justifying my position but is the lawyer wrong in his assertation? No. he is not and I do not disagree with his statement. His statement comes by faith and his certainty in God’s power, grace and mercy to work miracles in my life. My position however is in the certainty of God’s sovereign will and on His grace and mercy to work miracles in my life and my respond in all honesty is that I really do not know if God will actually heal me in the miraculous way because I did not hear it directly from Him. Still, I will take what the lawyer said to heart because it is still a word from God and the lawyer said it in a very confident manner and in certainty.

God is already very gracious with me and just to summarise some of the positive things:
a) Oncologist says I looked well.
b) My lab result showed that I am doing well also except for the platelet but that is not unexpected.
c) My liver function had improved.
d) I am slowly gaining weight.
e) The chemotherapy’s side effect is not as serious and manageable.
f) Through this period, I gained a better understanding, knowledge and experience about God.
g) Many people are praying for me and many believed that I will be healed in Jesus’ name.
h) I had the opportunity to spend time with my son but Josie will always say not enough… haha…
i) etc

Just repeating myself, I do believe in the power of God but I take the sovereignty of God as preeminent and everything else is secondary. When I am healed, it is because God had acted on His sovereignty.

My pastor shared once that sometime healing is a process (mentioned in one of my earlier blog) and not all healing happened in the miraculous and instantaneous ways. I take heart in this and perhaps it is God’s way to “force” me to review my life and make the necessary changes. If today, I am healed miraculously, then there is only one testimony. But now, I have many and I am proud of it because I can see God working not just in my life and in those around me.
In yesterday’s prayer by the lawyer, I forgot everything except this:

Psalm 27:4
One thing I have asked from the LORD, that I shall seek: That I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, To behold the beauty of the LORD And to meditate in His temple. (NASB)

How true it is… how important it is… how I loved dearly to behold the beauty of the LORD and to meditate in His temple.

In God I trust!!